Wednesday 5 December - morning

I’m not even sure how to begin to describe how wonderful this morning was (reader beware...this has potential to be a looooong post!). I woke early to get some work done before breakfast – yet, another scheduled power outage (I learned that they happen twice per day 6:30 – 7:00 am and 9:00 – 9:30 pm). I was able to get something accomplished before my laptop battery died. After breakfast we headed out to visit families of sponsored children. I will take the time to tell each family’s story because they touched me so deeply.

Our first stop was to the HMC sub-site’s very first sponsored child’s home (HMC1001). He has been sponsored for 8 years. His mother Chandramony was waiting for us and invited us inside. She was apologetic and very embarrassed that even though her son Abin was asked to stay home to greet me, he went to school that morning. I assured her it was fine and we sat and talked. Chandramony’s husband committed suicide about a year ago. He was an alcoholic and abusive. One day he simply couldn’t take the pressure anymore. Since then things have been very difficult (in a different way) for her. She is raising her two sons on her own. She is a coolie worker – going for daily wage work each day. Her family was living in a tent style house until they received help to build a four room house from the local panchayat (municipality) and Chalice. Chalice also furnished the home with the few items they own – a fan, table, chairs 2 beds and a desk. Her home is simple but tidy; a small kitchen, main room and two bedrooms. They also have an attached toilet (with outside access) which Chalice helped to build. She told me her eldest son Abin (sponsored) would like to join the military after his studies. He is presently in 10^th standard. Once he writes his final exams it will be determined which college he will go to based on his results. Chandramony accompanied us for the rest of our journey and she walked very close to me, taking my hand and holding an umbrella for me when we were in the sun.

The next home we visited was of a man who Chalice sponsors. He is differently-abled and has seizures. He lives with his sister in a very modest house. They have very few belongings. Kunju Joseph doesn’t sleep on a bed because his seizures cause him to fall off. So he sleeps on a mat on the floor. He isn’t able to do much with his time and sleeps most of the day. He used to work in the Convent’s garden but it seems he is unable to do this anymore. He complains of having pain in his body. Sponsorship helps ensure that his medication is paid for and his medical bills can be paid when he has to go to the hospital. His sister never married so she could care for him. She was very grateful to Chalice for easing some of the burden.

Many of the homes here have water tanks, supplied by Chalice. They get water from the panchayat but the water only flows for a half hour, every second day. They fill their water tanks so they have good water until the next time it’s turned on. Each quarter the Srs. give tanks to more families. This seemingly simple thing is such a huge help to the families. It means they do not have to walk to a water source and carry water as they need it and it ensures the water they have access to is safe (many of the natural water sources are contaminated and in the dry season they are scarce). Chalice has a Gift Catalogue programme where you can make donations to a certain category (Household Items, Health and Nutrition, Income Generation and Community Improvements - just to name a few) and have a card sent to a loved one to tell them you made a donation in their name. Check it out! There are some really cool (and unique) gift ideas that make a world of difference to people like these families I visited. There is also a Most Needed Category so you can give an unspecified amount and it will help provide items that our Sites request that don't necessarily fall into one of these categories. Our Skills@Chalice initiatives have been funded largely in this way.

Next we visited the home of my special friend JoJo. His mother is unable to care for herself or her three children. JoJo’s aunt was waiting for us. She never married so she could live with her sister and take care of the family. The children's father passed away. The Srs. told me that the money Anita (JoJo’s sister) earns by working in the convent’s kitchen will be put toward her dowry. Next to alcoholism and abuse, dowries are the next biggest issue. A girl like Anita, who will never go to college as she has severe learning disabilities and is from a low caste, will require a dowry of 2 – 3 lakhs (1 lakh is 100,000 Rs/ and there are about 50 Rs/ per $1 so that works out to 2 – 3 thousand dollars).

The next home we visited was of a sponsored girl – Bijisha. She was home with her sister, mother, aunt and baby cousin (who is absolutely adorable!). We sat and talked and I was invited into their home. They offered me something to drink but since I am being very careful about not taking any water or ice the Srs. brought along some mango juice and water for me. I wanted to give the 2 girls some juice as a treat. Bijisha gave hers to her baby cousin and after the first taste he would not put down the glass! He drank the whole thing. I gave Bijisha another glass for herself and he tried hard to get that as well! Bijisha’s father is an alcoholic and the family has very little because of his addiction. The Srs. try very hard to support people with addictions in the community by holding meetings and sending people to a rehab facility. More often than not they fall back into their addiction.

Next we visited Nimmy, a sponsored girl in the 10^th standard. Her father was in a car accident about 8 months ago and is still not healed. He has developed diabetes and lost two of his toes. Even though it pained him he stood to greet me when I arrived. His wife was unable to work while he was in the hospital as she was there taking care of him. The children stayed with their aunt during that time. Before the accident the family was repairing their house. All work had to stop and the house is only partly finished. Nimmy’s father was working as a rubber tree tapper before his accident but he has not been able to work since then. Their home is very empty and there is much left to be finished. As soon as Nimmy’s father can work again they plan to continue the work. Sponsorship helped a lot with the hospital bills and the care her father required.

Next we visited the home of Peter (Pathrose) and Mary, an older couple. Peter is a sponsored man. He is severely asthmatic and is unable to work anymore. Even taking a few steps made him lose his breath. Their house looks like a makeshift tent. The walls and the roof are made of plastic, pieced together and draped over bamboo. They received some money to build a house but were only able to lay a foundation before they ran out of money. The Sponsor Site has offered to build them a toilet from the Gift Catalogue (their current latrine is also a tent-like structure around a hole in the ground) but they insist on waiting until their house is finished so they can have an attached toilet. I asked Sr. Mary if they will ever finish their house; she doesn’t think they will. They do have electricity and one of their daughters gave them their television. It’s really hard for me to believe that people living in mere tents have electricity. Sr. Rani told me that electricity is quite inexpensive and like most people, immediate comfort is much easier to justify than long term improvement and not having electricity would not really make much difference in their savings – it costs about $1.50 per month for the little amount they use. Peter and Mary had three children. Their son Joseph passed away from cancer last year. They have his picture in their home and showed me. Joseph’s wife and two children left and went back to live with her family after his death. One of Mary and Peter’s daughters lives at home with them. She attends the Special School and was a Special Olympic bronze medalist in volleyball last year. Their other daughter lives next to them with her husband and two children. We visited their home next.

If you look closely you can see the fridge behind Sanimol.

Sanimol is Peter and Mary’s granddaughter. I noticed right away how much better condition their home was in (comparatively speaking...). Sr. Mary told me that it’s because her father does not drink and takes very good care of his family. He is a hard worker and his wife also earns some money by sewing from home. They have a lot of pride in their home and are happy they can take care of Sanimol’s grandparents. This family even has a refrigerator! This is very rare in this village and was the only one I saw.

Next we visited Tintu and her mother. Tintu’s house was the worst one I saw, next to Peter and Mary’s makeshift tent. I assumed that her father is an alcoholic and Sr. Mary confirmed my suspicions. The difference to Sanimol’s house is like night and day. Tintu has braces and is very self conscious. She was hesitant to smile but I finally got one or two out of her. Sr. Mary said she thinks the braces were provided by a group in the town that gives assistance to families for health and dental. From what I understood braces are not near as expensive as they are here.

The next house to Tintu’s is Dalimol’s. I should mention that each home we visited, the children followed us to the next place. At this point we had quite a nice group! I took a photo of all of the sponsored girls together. Sr. Mary told me they are close in age and very good friends. Dalimol’s house is quite a bit nicer than any of the others that we saw and they are in the process of adding on a kitchen. Sr. told me that like Sanimol’s family, they work very hard and have been able to fix their home up quite nicely (again, this is all comparatively speaking...).

The last house we visited was across a little river. A woman was waiting for us with the biggest smile. She was so happy to see us! She has two children, a boy and a girl. Her daughter, Kuriath is sponsored. Sr. Mary told me that this woman’s husband left her for another woman. He had never been faithful to her and often left for weeks without telling her where he was. About a year ago he left and never returned. He is living with this new, younger woman quite nearby but never sees his children. His wife is left to raise them alone. She has been shunned by many people because of it and it’s caused her a lot of sadness. Despite this she was very loving and proud to show me photos of her children. She never stopped smiling and hugged me more times than I can remember! Sr. told me the sponsorship is a huge help for her considering her circumstances. Later that afternoon she spoke in front of all of the sponsored families about how grateful she is and that she considers her sponsor like God. She prays every day for the blessings she has in her life. It was really touching to hear her speak knowing her story.

I’ll end this post here. Believe it or not, this was just the morning of a very full day! The next post will have the rest of the details of this incredible day.